Great Moments in B.O.O.B.S. History XXIII: The Day the Earth Quaked

It was a sunny July afternoon, the beer was left in the sun, the bocce was enjoyed by all, and the entire world moved. The Tipp Hill Tossers faced off in a battle of epic proportions against the Scehcky Dreidle less Eggs on a Fork, these titans of the B.O.O.B.S. battled through an entire two cases of beer before anyone was able to get an advantage. The turning point came in the second game as the combatants from the Tipp Hill Tossers could not throw a ball without it ending up in the ditch. The final throw was that of Paul Colabufo. All Paul needed to do was simply toss the ball with a medium … Read More »

August 8, 2005

Dear Pope,

Dear Benedict XIV,

I have been under the impression that God loves bocce players. However, I
have begun to feel that God either does not exist or has no special place in
his heart for bocce. If God likes bocce, why aren’t bocce sets comparable
in price to heathen white trash games such as horseshoes? Even at walmart, where nothing cost more than $30, a bocce set is $50 plus shipping.

I know that many people wish you to spend time on other matters. However I believe this issue is of utmost importance. It has been said that a smile can heal a sickness and a wink can cure cancer… If this is true than one can surely … Read More »

The Candylicker Cums Back

It is with much embarrassment that in this site’s first two months of existence the first mention of the great Marvin Sease was made yesterday. The average bocce fan may be asking what the inclusion of the pimptastic Marvin Sease has to do with the sport of bocce. The answer: Marvin Sease cured cancer.

Marvin Sease cured cancer? Yes, Marvin Sease through his refreshing tales of cunnilingus, cured the cancerous stigma that going down on a woman’s vagina is an awful thing to do.

Marvin Sease was not always the esteemed musician and lover that he is today. As a youth he was consistently made to feel negative by his schoolmates for his love of cunnilingus. The … Read More »

JULY 19, 2005… A DAY THAT WILL LIVE IN INFAMY

WARNING: Due to the graphic nature of this article, which will depict of a level of bocce so abhorrently bad that merely reading about it constitutes a health risk, children under the age of 16, pregnant women, and people with heart defects would be well advised to turn back now, and avoid reading any further.

11-0

Joining the pantheon of great rivalries such as Tyson vs. McNeely, Reagan vs. Mondale, Germany vs. Poland, Hammer vs. Nail, Tsunami vs. Southeast Asia, and Hot Knife vs. Butter, comes Beer United vs. Cunnilingus City.

11-0

In what can only be described as a debacle of all-time proportions, heavy favorite Cunnilingus City, coming off a convincing 3-0 drubbing of Eggs on a Fork and brimming with confidence took … Read More »