Great Moments in B.O.O.B.S. History XLII: Feud Over Beer United

In a dim, smoky and stuffy room off in the corner of the Martino residence, an argument was brewing.

Phil Martino, Paul Colabufo, and Jim McCarthy had been sitting in the room, drinking and smoking for many tense hours as they pored over potential B.O.O.B.S. applicants to join the league in its inaugural season. After much soul searching, they were able to weed their lists down to a total of sixteen people, each name scribbled onto a hastily cut piece of paper in crayon. As Paully began drawing names from a hat to make up teams, The Hammer let out the fateful words that have shaped B.O.O.B.S. history ever since: “Let’s hope Phil and I are on the … Read More »

Great Moments in B.O.O.B.S. History XXIII: The Day the Earth Quaked

It was a sunny July afternoon, the beer was left in the sun, the bocce was enjoyed by all, and the entire world moved. The Tipp Hill Tossers faced off in a battle of epic proportions against the Scehcky Dreidle less Eggs on a Fork, these titans of the B.O.O.B.S. battled through an entire two cases of beer before anyone was able to get an advantage. The turning point came in the second game as the combatants from the Tipp Hill Tossers could not throw a ball without it ending up in the ditch. The final throw was that of Paul Colabufo. All Paul needed to do was simply toss the ball with a medium … Read More »

August 8, 2005

Dear Pope,

Dear Benedict XIV,

I have been under the impression that God loves bocce players. However, I
have begun to feel that God either does not exist or has no special place in
his heart for bocce. If God likes bocce, why aren’t bocce sets comparable
in price to heathen white trash games such as horseshoes? Even at walmart, where nothing cost more than $30, a bocce set is $50 plus shipping.

I know that many people wish you to spend time on other matters. However I believe this issue is of utmost importance. It has been said that a smile can heal a sickness and a wink can cure cancer… If this is true than one can surely … Read More »

The Candylicker Cums Back

It is with much embarrassment that in this site’s first two months of existence the first mention of the great Marvin Sease was made yesterday. The average bocce fan may be asking what the inclusion of the pimptastic Marvin Sease has to do with the sport of bocce. The answer: Marvin Sease cured cancer.

Marvin Sease cured cancer? Yes, Marvin Sease through his refreshing tales of cunnilingus, cured the cancerous stigma that going down on a woman’s vagina is an awful thing to do.

Marvin Sease was not always the esteemed musician and lover that he is today. As a youth he was consistently made to feel negative by his schoolmates for his love of cunnilingus. The … Read More »