The Turbo Bocce Top 100 Songs of the Decade: 80-71

Day three of our top 100 countdown begins. Putting together a list of 100 songs is a lot bigger of a pain in the ass than you’d think, especially when you set the rule for yourself that you can’t have repeat songs from the same artist. Luckily I’m still unemployed and have absolutely nothing else to do. Here’re my picks for 80-71.

80 fuck buttons – the lisbon maru


A slow drone that builds up to a marching beat for some fantastical creatures through the sky. After their first album, this song and album completely blew me away.

79 The Darkness – Hazel Eyes


A song from a band that is far more self-aware of what a parody it is than most people would think. A hilarious song from a hilarious band.

78 Gnarls Barkley – Crazy


For years it felt like you couldn’t get away from this song. It would be every third song on the radio, and piped in the muzak at every store you walked in to. What the hell was the person singing? Was it male or female? When you ended up realizing the singer was a fat black man it seemed almost disappointing. God help you if you worked retail, the song would follow your every footstep for years. I couldn’t even listen to the actual version of the damn song so here’s the live video.

77 Ludacris feat T-Paine – One More Drink


If one song could be the theme song for the majority of my decade, this would basically be it. Lord knows I’m not proud, but there it is.

76 Boards of Canada – Dayvan Cowboy


A sweepingly beautiful song that seems to be about nothing but uplifting a person above their humanity and transcending this plane.

75 Britney Spears – Toxic


Voted the world’s second favorite song of the world of all time by a Sony Ericsson poll, it’s hard to argue with how in charge Britney was back then. After all is said and done and after Britney shaved her head and went crazy, it’s nice to point to a particular work that shows just why anyone even cared about her in the first place.

74 Tony Dize – Permitame


If this is what it’s like to fly on Wisin and Yandel’s private plane, then sign me the fuck up.

73 Scissor Sisters – I don’t feel like dancing


It would be very easy to believe that this song was some deep cut from the Bee Gees b-sides or something, but nope, it’s just a really gay song from 2006 featuring Elton John.

72 Bone Crusher – Never Scared


Bone Crusher’s comically deep and raspy voice fills this song with a bravado the likes of which we rarely see. That it was included with a Madden game only makes it better.

71 Nelly feat P.Didy & Murphy Lee – Shake Ya Tail Feather


One drunken night at karaoke, Woz decided that he would step up to the plate and solo this song. It was more fantastic than you could imagine, but, as is usually the case in these drunken episodes, all I can remember is saying “Whoa, that’s awesome.”