Local 315 Brewing week was the first beautiful sunshiny week in both leagues, and it was good to see 100+ people at bocce again!
I only vaguely remember the sun coming down to earth and trying to kill us, but that always happens on sunny days, right? Or was that Super Mario? Who can tell the difference?
Please allow this bocce recap to help get you through your Monday. I know how it is … you work, you come home, you’re bored – there’s a monkey on your back. Let Turbo Bocce get that monkey off your back and into a tuxedo . . . the way monkey’s look best.
Standout Team Performance
Dog Brothers – Jeez, why don’t you try letting other people score every once in a while.
Twinning – Really nice 2-1 win against a very good Dead Rabbits team. They had 7 aces as a team. Aces tend to be hard to beat, so I get why they won.
Buff Ave Babes – What a great start to the season they are having!
Kristen & Lisa – These rookies got their first wins and what a way to do it, with a 3-0 week! They are now undefeated against everybody who is not the reigning champion.
Super Bocce Bros – A huge 3-0 week for the newcomers. Presumably they were able to win at bocce while jumping over the sun when it attacked.
Shoe Maker – In their first game of the season (and Rick’s first time every playing Turbo Bocce) they managed to go 3-0. Pretty damn impressive, in fact that’s the most impressive performance from a Shoe Maker since Hans Christian Anderson wrote The Little Mermaid.
Glory Rollers – They look like a team ready to win a championship to me.
Perhaps you lost last week to one of these teams and you’re feeling a little down, come find me. I’ll give you a hug and try to make you feel better. “Hugs not drugs” that’s what I say . . . although I’m usually I’m on drugs when I say things like that.
Highlights
Dance like nobody is watching. Because they are not . . . they’re all playing bocce!
Local 315 Brewing
BIG thanks to Local 315 Brewery for brewing up and delivering a tasty batch of Bocce Brew for us to try! It was delicious and the perfect liquid to double fist on a hot summer day … you can quote me on that!
Standout Individual Performers
20 Point Club (All Time Record 26)
Kristen McGriff – Kristen & Lisa – 23
Phil Martino – Dog Brothers – 22
Greg Griffo – Los Moppines – 21
John Bauman – Uncle Jus in the Muff – 20
Kevan Busa – Super Bocce Bros – 20
Matt Wieczorek – Theos – 20
Mike Aylesworth – Droppin Balls – 20
Andy Ingalls – Amerika’z Most Wanted – 20
5 Bocce Club (All Time Record 16)
Amy Bramhall – Corey & Amy – 9
Danielle Guffre – Teen Mom III – 9
Emily Cummings – Emily’s Team – 9
Angelo Isgro – Kiss My Ace – 9
Jessica Haas – All Is Fair In Love & Bocce – 8
Tony Guffre – Teen Mom III – 7
Jayson Gray – Kiss My Ace – 7
Andy Ingalls – Amerika’z Most Wanted – 7
Marty McDermott – Theos – 7
Dino Franceschi – Gone Fishing – 7
Ty’Nea Breland, Matt Wieczorek, Phil Martino, Jon Roche, Kristen Tuper, and Alyssa Neider all had 6
Jon Szewczyk, Greg Griffo, Kegor Griffo, Amy McClusky, and Katie Martino all had 5
As you may have noticed there were a TON of bocces this week. In the game between Kiss My Ace and Teen Mom III each team had an amazing 16 bocces! Also, there are two Greg Griffo’s in the Wednesday League. So if you happen to play on Tuesday and you see Greg Griffo listed that’s not the one you are used to playing with, that’s his cousin. Tuesday’s Greg is listed as Kegor to try to simplify things.
3 Ace Club (All Time Record 11)
Colin Donahoe – Droppin Balls – 5
Danielle Guffre – Teen Mom III – 4
Kim Pomeroy – Blonde Bocce Bitches – 4
Kristen McGriff – Kristen & Lisa – 4
Siobhan Christou – Twinning – 4
Corey Bramhall, Jessica Haas, Lisa Giocondo, Jeff Williams, Jessica Blake, Rob Calvani, and Emily Cummings all had 3
Also it was a big week for aces … actually it was a pretty big week all around. Colin might make a run a most aces in a week for the year, with 5, and both Twinning and Kristen & Lisa had 7 aces on the day!
Multiple Turbo Round Win Club (All Time Record 3)
John Bauman – Uncle Jus in the Muff – 2
Greg McGee – Glory Rollers – 2
Scott Mead – Big LeBocce – 2
Joe LaCelle – Dead Rabbits – 2
The moon was even more beautiful than the sun on 315 Brewing Week. Hope we can do this again next year!
Rant
Since I tend to write these things very quickly during breaks at work, you pretty much read whatever’s on my mind at that particular moment. I wanted to take this idea one step further (as we do with everything at Turbo Bocce) and go off on a wild borderline nonsensical rant about whatever happens to be bouncing around in my brain. You can google all this stuff and perhaps learn something interesting, or you can just read it and (hopefully) chuckle at how crazy it is, or you can just ignore this section entirely. Up to you.
Winning a Turbo Bocce championship is better than carrying around fireworks that spell SAUSAGE in the air so that your husband, wife, or robot child who wears an apron that reads “I hope I’m good at this” will see it in the sky, know you’re in the mood to eat sausages, and cook them so they are ready for you to eat as soon as you get home. The fireworks will probably misspell the word sausage anyway, because hey life’s not perfect, the threat of nuclear Apocalypse is real, and who knows what kind of mutants the fallout will create – perhaps some kind of human/bouncy house hybrid? And who can concentrate on spelling under these circumstances?
